Fraternity and sorority life professionals have a responsibility as student affairs specialists to provide support, programs and services for GLBT students. In my eight years of working with fraternities and sororities I have learned many lessons reaching out to students examining and working through their own sexual orientation. In addition, I have worked with Greek student leaders to examine methods to support GLBT students in their chapters and throughout the fraternity and sorority community. In my time as a professional, I have made mistakes, misspoke, and over-reacted. As a result, I have determined that the evolution to being an ally for GLBT Greek students is one we must embark on with great intention and commitment to constantly learn from one another. We must understand the environment in which we work, decide that we will support all students and create a coalition among fraternity and sorority life constituents to affect positive change for GLBT issues. My hope is to share some tips for fellow professionals to consider as part of their commitment to fraternity and sorority life.

Understanding Fraternity and Sorority Life

Fraternity and sorority professionals often had an experience as an undergraduate member of a fraternity or sorority. This is not the case for all, but more often than not they have been affiliated with a fraternity or sorority. Regardless of this affiliation, all of them have had an experience as a college student and have had some experience being trained to work with fraternities and sororities. Knowing the history of the Greek community and the issues impacting fraternities and sororities can be helpful in creating strategies to assist GLBT students within these fraternal organizations.

Tip: Learn as much as possible about the culture of fraternities and sororities in relation to Greek Life.

Fraternities and sororities have cultural attributes that can be examined to assist you in learning more about supporting GLBT students in these environments:

• Be a student of fraternity and sorority culture. Read varying perspectives on the evolution of these organizations.
• Read about hazing. Understand the connections between hazing and homophobia
• Study alcohol’s role in Greek Life. Understand the connections between alcohol misuse and abuse and heterosexism.
• Research information on homophobia and the college fraternity and sorority.
• Review the literature on being Gay and Greek and the varying capacities exhibited by fraternities and sororities to be safe spaces for GLBT students.
• Become a member and study the contents of the Lambda 10 webpage; this is your clearinghouse for information on Greek Life and GLBT issues.
• Explore the impact of fraternity and sorority membership on student development.
• Examine how student development theory of GLBT members connects to student development theory as applied to fraternity and sorority members.
• Know student development theory also from the perspective of students of color as a way to support LGBG students in cultural identity organizations.

The Decision to Support

As you learn more information about how GLBT students experience fraternity and sorority membership, you will come to a point where you will make a decision about how you will support GLBT fraternity and sorority members. This isn’t always easy; however making such a decision can not only have an impact on your fraternity and sorority community, but will also allow for students to find you approachable and understanding. As much as you are a fraternity and sorority professional, remember that you are probably also a counselor, advisor, and sometimes friend to your students. They need you to be vocal and visible.

Tip: Participate in Safe Zone or ally training.

Being an ally is not a difficult process. All you have to be willing to do is listen, learn and demonstrate support for students who are GLBT. However, there are official training opportunities available where fraternity and sorority professionals can participate to assist in this process:

• Find out if your campus has a “Safe Zone” and ally program. Participate in its training.
• If you do not have such a program, seek out individuals within student life who would be invested in coordinating such an effort.
• Once you have completed the training, promote participation in the program by Greek leaders or set up a separate ally training for fraternity and sorority members
• Create a coalition who is invested in creating a safe zone program for fraternity and sorority members Hang any ally posters, buttons or other paraphernalia in a public place in your office to demonstrate support.
• When attending professional conferences such as the American College Personnel Association, the Association of College Unions International, Association of Fraternity Advisors, and the National Association of Student Personnel Administrators participate in any efforts to educate on being an ally or addressing hateful behavior.

Tip: Do not be afraid to be “out there!”

Allies are faced with a peculiar reality that they must be vocal and visible in their support of GLBT students while not identifying as GLBT themselves. For professionals who are concerned with public perception, this can be challenging. In addition, a fraternity and sorority professional may work with a wide range of leaders who have varying levels of tolerance for GLBT students. Speaking as an advocate may cause some students to not work with you or think that you yourself are GLBT:

• Don’t be afraid to be “out there”. You know who you are and those who are most connected to you know who you are. Does it matter if someone who has not taken the time to work with you judges you?
• Surround yourself with other allies and ask them about their journey of support. As student affairs professionals, we can all use more support groups (“Hi, my name is Dan and I am addicted to helping people”).
• Confront assumptions about your own sexual orientation when they are made. Would you only support a student of color because you are a person of color yourself? Hopefully not. Therefore, challenge people’s prejudices!
• Challenge perceptions of students through conversation: ask them why it would matter if you are or are not GLBT. Support of GLBT students can have no connection at all to your own sexual orientation.
• Work with students to eliminate assumptions that if you support GLBT students than you are in fact GLBT. This is a developmental issue at its very core. Studying student development theory, particularly moral and ethical development can be helpful.

Tip: Demonstrate support for undergraduates who are GLBT Greeks.

Fraternity and sorority professionals are invested in the development of students who are participating in the college fraternity movement.  These students, of course, include members who are GLBT either closeted or out. When we work with students in fraternities and sororities, there are particular approaches we may use:

• Develop skills to assist in counseling students. Working with any student requires counseling skills to assist them in feeling comfortable and secure as they seek your advice. This is particularly true for students who may be dealing with their sexual orientation.
• Don’t try to throw them into a theoretical box, however knowing student development theory particularly with attention to GLBT theory is helpful
• Attention to student development theory on persons of color should be a priority if addressing GLBT Gay fraternity and sorority members who are also African American, Asian American, Latino/Latina and Native American.
• Resist the urge to throw them up as a martyr. As an advocate yourself you may be relieved to have a student come to you (finally, we can create that Ally program I always wanted to do!): however you should respect where he or she is with their own coming out process.
• Learn the reasons why GLBT students join fraternities and sororities (hint, they’re no different than straight students).
• Ask a lot of questions. While you’re the Greek expert on your campus, very rarely are you the GLBT expert. Ask them about their experience without assuming that you can predict their responses. This is where those listening skills you have been trying to work on come in handy!
• Purchasing Out on Fraternity Row is a good idea. On pages 256-257 there is information on what to do when a fraternity brother comes out. I wish I had this book during my first interaction with a student coming out.

Tip: Capture the vision of your undergraduate Greek Allies.

While the literature may reflect fraternities and sororities as a less hospitable environment for GLBT members, there are members who are committed to their brothers and sisters regardless of their sexual orientation. Some are prepared to be strong vocal advocates. Some will use passive permission as their approach. One thing for sure is that opportunities exist to create allies in the fraternity and sorority community:

• Organized efforts to create allies should be a priority. Demonstrating support could mean soliciting members to be involved in the development of a formalized GLBT Greek Ally program. Models can be viewed by visiting the Lambda 10 website. The Pillar Program is one such model. Lambda 10 has resources as well to assist in developing such a program.
• Encourage students to participate in existing campus efforts to educate on allies. Don’t wait to get the Greek version going. If you need to set up a program, contact the appropriate people on your campus.
• Host a program. Engage students in this process (have you not figured out yet that students will be invested in what they help create). Bring in a speaker or create other forums such as coffeehouses to discuss GLBT fraternity and sorority programs.
• Give the students you know who are allies information on Lambda 10; encourage them to purchase books, read articles, and examine the resources on being an ally (see Windmeyer, pp. 277-280).

Tip: Talk withundergraduate members who are straight, homophobic or heterosexist.

Realize that students create their perceptions from a wide range of life experiences: religion, parent views, peer group in college, desire to be “macho”, etc.  Some straight students may be accepting but not identify this as a cause they care to advocate for. However, some members may exhibit behavior that is confrontational or demeaning to GLBT students. Students who demonstrate homophobic behavior are not bad people. Some of them are very good people, but their understanding may be influenced by a wide range of experiences. Fraternity and sorority advisors who come into contact with students who may be homophobic or heterosexist could implement the following measures:

• Ask questions. Learn how they have formed their opinions.
• Challenge without being confrontational or judgmental. You may want to ring their neck for their thoughts, but remember where you were at when you were that age. I doubt you were perfect!
• Agree to disagree but ask that the student see your opinion as much as you will seek to understand theirs.
• Encourage the student to talk with GLBT Greeks about their experiences to learn and to ask questions,
• Educate students on campus policy on hate speech and harassment. Share non-discrimination policies with students. Inform them that while they have a right to their views that acting on them in certain manners can result in violation of policy and the law.
• Know that behavior and attitude can change. Student Development Theory speaks volumes about the formative years of students while attending a college or university. You can influence their opinions by being a good role model and advocating. Sometimes students can only identify people who support GLBT students as members of the GLBT community. You may be the first ally that they have had interaction with.

Creating a Coalition of Invested Constituents

            An approach that maximizes your resources and the skills around you can impact your success.  There are many invested constituents who should have a concern about fraternity and sorority life on campus and GLBT issues.   You can make that case if the constituents have never discussed or considered their role in educational program efforts, support services or other necessary interventions.  By having a coalition of committed people and organizations, the outcomes will be quicker and develop potentially larger, more systemic, educational outcomes for GLBT issues.

Tip: Involve your alumni.

Fraternity and sorority alumni can be such a blessing to a chapter. They are integral to the longevity of the organization. However, it is important to note that alumni enter into the world of advising with varying experiences. Some may be from the same chapter or from a chapter clear across the country. Some may be a recent graduate and some may have graduated 10-40 years ago. Knowing this can help you in working with alumni on issues of sexual orientation:

• Don’t make assumptions. You may be inclined to think that older alumni will be less open minded whereas younger ones may be more open minded. It can vary. Only assume that you need to be an advocate.
• Depending on the alumni, revisit the tips I offered for undergraduate members for GLBT alumni, ally alumni and straight or heterosexist or homophobic alumni. They were once there themselves and while people grow more immersed in their beliefs as they age, people’s opinions can change through interaction.
• Provide literature on campus demographics. Literature such as the university non-discrimination clause or informing them of the development of an GLBT Center can help them realize the presence of GLBT students (sometimes they’re just so disconnected that they don’t know how much of a presence GLBT students have on some campuses). I remember one advisor being shocked that the president that he thought was the greatest leader ever in his chapter came out after college. I looked at him and said “you didn’t see that coming?”
• With any alumni, try to help them understand their role as an advisor. Some alumni can master this easily. Some will involve themselves a little too much. Advisor training on all issues, including sexual orientation and diversity is necessary to properly engage alumni.
• If you have alumni who are out or willing to be supportive of GLBT fraternity and sorority members seek their assistance with the development of any programs or services.

Tip: Partner with headquarter staff.

Fraternity and sorority headquarters can be leaders in promoting awareness around GLBT issues. Some have nondiscrimination statements inclusive of sexual orientation while others may have sensitivity programs for educating members. There may even be committed resources to increasing GLBT awareness efforts. Some organizations; however, have not made such decisions yet. To get more information, you need to form partnerships with headquarters:

• Ask questions. When consultants come, ask them about the headquarters efforts to provide support for GLBT members. Ask about policy or stance on sexual orientation.
• Inform headquarters about campus policy. If you have a non-discrimination clause for the campus that includes sexual orientation, provide a copy to the headquarters.
• Encourage headquarters you have a partnership with to provide education to field consultants on homophobia as a risk management issue.
• Sometimes undergraduates will say that their headquarters would not allow a gay member in. Challenge this. Inform the headquarters that they are saying this. I have to laugh when a chapter member says this and I like to start my conversations with “boy, let me tell you about a little thing called discrimination.”
• With headquarters staff, a good rule of thumb is to be a good partner by communicating on campus and chapter specific issues. Creating a relationship with headquarters staff ahead of time for any issue can make the process of advocating for GLBT resources that much easier because you will have a relationship.

Tip: Work with campus colleagues to affect change.

The partnerships I have developed with campus offices representing the many facets of student affairs such as programs for minority students, campus health centers, and GLBT centers have permitted me to better understand my campus and forge other learning opportunities for fraternity and sorority life.   These partnerships have been useful partners to find constituents who are invested in supporting GLBT students regardless of their affiliation with fraternities or sororities. Here are some tips for working with other student affairs colleagues, as well as faculty members, on your campus:

• Try to serve on a committee related to diversity. It is important for campus offices to know that you are an ally for issues of underrepresented populations.
• Purchase copies of resources and books on Gay Greeks for your GLBT center.
• When you start a position, try to set up a meeting with the GLBT Center or applicable support unit to discuss opportunities to partner.
• Involve your students. It is great to be your Greek community’s advocate for GLBT issues; however, any efforts to program between the Greek community and the GLBT community should have students behind the initiative. Remember, we work for and with students, so shouldn’t they have a say in things?
• Attend a program or two a year to demonstrate support. Yes, you are busy, but this may be just as important as attending the Greek Week Olympics for an hour and more people will care that you are there!
• Participate in your campus ally training; invite other colleagues to come with you.
• Ask questions. More likely than not, you are not going to be the campus Greek expert AND the campus GLBT expert. Don’t try to be both. Know what you’re good at and surround yourself with other people to help you do the other things well. We as fraternity and sorority professionals so often want to be the martyr don’t we?

Tip:  Seek assistance from national fraternity and sorority colleagues to affect change.

Attending the Interfraternity Institute in the summer of 1999, I was able to interact on a very personal basis with several gay colleagues. I was able to have wonderful conversations with them about their challenges as closeted or out undergraduates. I was able to talk more with them about how their sexual orientation impacts how students view them. I was able to visit a bar catering to the GLBT community with about 45 other people. As one of just a few straight men there, I was able to watch and witness the interactions people had. This being my first experience in such an establishment, it was a bit awkward at first; however my second time in such a place was not awkward at all (in fact, I tried to hide the fact that I wasn’t gay when asked and then got busted when my friend outed me as straight). We can do things to partner with our colleagues across the country who also want to support GLBT students in fraternities and sororities:

• Learn what is being done on other campuses. Do not reinvent the wheel when creating programs to support GLBT Greeks. Many venues such as the Association of Fraternity Advisors (AFA) listserv are great places to get information.
• Sign up for the Lambda 10 resources. It is free and there is a lot out there to help you!
• Do not be afraid to ask your colleagues about their experiences of being Gay and Greek. Dialogue can be a powerful tool for understanding.
• Participate in Stop the Hate training. This is a great program to address prejudice not only toward GLBT students but to all students!
• Attend workshops to learn how to service GLBT students. Historically, student affairs as a profession has been supportive of GLBT issues. You are bound to find a few workshops on the topic of GLBT concerns that will either be related to fraternity and sorority life or can easily be applied.
• Visit the GLBT reception at the AFA/NIC Annual Meeting or at any professional conference (really, wearing the pink triangle will go well with your suit).
• The Association of Fraternity Advisors (AFA), a professional organization consisting of professionals and volunteers committed to the fraternal movement within higher education and the profession of student affairs, is a great association to become involved in. Awareness and education around GLBT issues is a concern for the association. Why not become a member today!
• Read the AFA resolutions on heterosexism and homophobia. They can be a guide for your work.
• The association has been very forthcoming in providing supportive venues for GLBT professionals at the annual meeting and has also passed resolutions on heterosexism and homophobia. Their annual meeting is typically hosted in later November/early December. You should attend it!

Final Choice as a Fraternity & Sorority Life Professional

Fraternity and sorority professional staff must support all students who are grappling with issues not only related to the fraternity and sorority community but also with individual issues.  These may often include GLBT concerns.  As with all aspects of the work of fraternity and sorority professionals, being someone who supports GLBT fraternity and sorority members is an evolutionary process.   Over the years, I have had to study and learn how to be supportive of colleagues, fraternity and sorority alumni, undergraduate members and other individuals who have a different sexual orientation than myself. I have examined how fraternities and sororities as environments support and also provide an additional challenge for GLBT students.  Plus, I have created opportunities to learn from and educate other constituents invested in the fraternal movement as far as the importance of GLBT issues to what we do.  No matter throughout my process and professional role, I have always made the decision to support GLBT students vocally and to be an advocate.   I have listed below one final tip of some recommendations for possible readings to help you better understand the process of supporting GLBT fraternity and sorority members. Hopefully these tips that I have shared can assist fraternity and sorority life professionals in their own role to make a more positive difference within their campus community.  Please know that your support is immeasurable for Greek students who happen to be GLBT.  Often you will be the first person who they turn to ask for advice. The final choice for your role to be an ally is always yours.

Tip: Where to start your journey?

Allan, E.J. (2004). The making of men. Retrieved October 22, 2004 from             http://www.stophazing.org/makingofmen.htm

Case, D. (1995). A glimpse of the invisible membership- a national survey of lesbigay Greek members. Retrieved October 22, 2004 from             http://organizations.smsu.edu/bigala/Homo101/ greek.htm

Evans, N. J., Forney, D. S., & Guido-Dibrito, F. (1998). Student development in college:                        Theory, research, and practice. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

Horowitz, H.L. (1987). Campus Life. Chicago, IL.: University of Chicago Press.

Komives, S.R., Woodard, Jr., D.B. & Associates (2003). Student Services: A handbook for the profession (4th ed.) (pp. 555-572). San Francisco: Jossey Bass.

Kimbrough, W. M. (2003) Black Greek 101: The culture, customs and challenges of Black fraternities and sororities. Cranbury, NJ: Associated University Press.

Lambda 10 Project (2004). Website at http://www.lambda10.org.

National Consortium of Directors of LGBT Resources in Higher Education (1). Resource             Collection. Retrieved October 15, 2004 from http://www.lgbtcampus.org/resources/index.html

National Consortium of Directors of LGBT Resources in Higher Education (2). Frequently asked questions Retrieved October 15, 2004 from http://www.lgbtcampus.org/faq/safe_zone.html

Nuwer, H. (Ed.) (2004). The hazing reader. Bloomington, IN: Indiana University Press:

Rudolph, F. (1990). The American college and university: A history. (2nd Ed.). Athens,             GA.University of Georgia Press.

Stop the Hate (2004). Stop the hate train the trainer program. Information retrieved on             October 19, 2004 from http://www.stophate.org/stophate/

Windmeyer, S. L. & Freeman, P.W. (2004). Fraternity and sorority anti-homophobia training. Retrieved November 10, 2004 from             http://www.lambda10.org/

Windmeyer, S. L. & Freeman, P.W. (2000). Secret Sisters.. Los Angeles: Alyson Books.           

Windmeyer, S. L. & Freeman, P.W. (1998). Out on Fraternity Row. Los Angeles: Alyson             Books.           

Dan Bureau is the Assistant Dean of Students for Greek Affairs at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign. He served as the 2004 Association of Fraternity Advisors President. On campus and nationally, he works to create allies for the LGBT fraternity and sorority community.